Cycling in Period Sweats

My period is late. I am not pregnant. No, my period is late because the second I start my flow-sweet-flow, I will officially start IVF and my period fancies herself a little prankster. My period has managed to show up where she was never wanted. Prom? Check. New relationship? Check. Really long road trip? You betcha. White pants? Every. Single. Time. But, not this time. No matter what she's a no-show. I have tried, working out, I mean really working out. Grown up stuff. Eating spicy foods. Wearing a white shirt dress. And still no, Becky (yeah, I named my period, deal with it). Am I revealing too much? First of all I have two sisters, so this kind of stuff gets talked about in my world, even before I joined the barren biz.  



In the past 24 months, I have talked about very private lady things with those who are the most interested. It started out innocently enough. Husband and I had been trying for a few months and I had this sinking feeling that something was wrong. I was at lunch with a friend, who I knew had problems getting on the baby train in the past; so, I asked her, "were you regular?" and "when did you get help?" I must have blacked out after that because the next thing I remember, was that I was sitting in Dr. High-Five's office describing the color and consistency of Becky. It didn't stop there, so far to-date I have talked to the following people about my cycle, and might I add that none of these were conversations that I initiated:  A psychic (what? my mom's told her I wasn't ovulating), my mom, Dr. Encyclopedia, Dr. Encyclopedia's nurse, three nurse practitioners, Dr. Encyclopedia's receptionist, all of his billing department, my family practice doctor, the CIO at my company, my boss, my office mate, my cycling instructor, my personal trainer, my personal shopper, my hairstylist, mother-in-law, father-in-law, sister-in-law, brother-in-law, my neighbors (on both sides), my best friend, grandmother, total strangers in IVF class, all of the other doctors at The Making Baby Dreams Come True Clinic (actually, while baby was goal one when I started going to TMBDCT Clinic, goal two quickly became, everyone there is taking a look at my cervix-goal two is nearly accomplished). co-workers, the girl who sales me scentsy, my acupuncturist, and of course my sisters. And now, here I sit, in my period sweats typing with a bag of almond m&m's on one side of my laptop and a bag of cheese popcorn on the other, I have gotten up no less than three times just to see if Becky is here but, its likely that that pain in my stomach isn't her at all, its likely, this time its the fear of; what if IVF doesn't work?